The King & His Kingdom: #87 - Family Discipline | Matthew 18:15-20

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Almighty God. [00:00:03] Speaker B: You welcome you. [00:00:06] Speaker C: Hey there. If you're new to Restored Church, we want to welcome you and thank you for tuning in. You're listening to a portion of our Sunday worship gathering. We believe the church is not an event, but a family you belong to, so we would love the opportunity to connect with you. If you want to learn more about our church or if we can help you in any way, please Visit our website, www.restoredtemecula.church and click on Contact. With all that said, we, we hope you enjoy the message. [00:00:35] Speaker B: All right, so I want to tell you something that kind of, kind of wild that happened to me. [00:00:46] Speaker A: I love it. So Monday, this past Monday. [00:00:55] Speaker B: I met. [00:00:55] Speaker A: With Mike and Harrik. We had a quick elders meeting. We needed to connect on some things. And, I mean, the weather on Monday was spectacular. It was beautiful. It was like, that's why we live here. Like, it's so nice. It was sunny. [00:01:10] Speaker B: So we met outside and we're chatting through some things. And as we're talking off to my right, I hear this woman speaking. [00:01:23] Speaker A: And. [00:01:24] Speaker B: Her voice is elevated. [00:01:26] Speaker A: She's raising her voice. She's starting to get more and more intense. [00:01:30] Speaker B: I mean, just swear words, swear words, swear words. Like, you could tell she's really worked up. She's really upset. And I look over and I'm kind of shocked. Not because I've never heard anybody, you. [00:01:44] Speaker A: Know, be upset before, but I look over and what was shocking was that. [00:01:51] Speaker B: She was speaking to her preschool daughter. And it was one of those, like. [00:01:56] Speaker A: Oh, you know, you get that sinking feeling in your stomach where you're like, oh, poor thing. [00:02:04] Speaker B: And like, I just want to be clear. [00:02:05] Speaker A: Like, being a parent's hard, huh? Can I get an amen? Sometimes you say and do things that you regret in your attempts to, I don't know, parent your children. I know I've blown it as a parent more times than I could count. But listening to the way that she was engaging with. I'm presuming it was her daughter, this preschool age little girl, like, witnessing the. [00:02:30] Speaker B: Way that she was engaging with her. [00:02:32] Speaker A: Like, it's still. [00:02:33] Speaker B: I can maybe hear it in my. [00:02:34] Speaker A: Voice even I get still, like, oh, like, it still, like, disturbs me just a little bit. [00:02:40] Speaker B: But I know what she was. I know what she was trying to do. Like, every single parent, they have a process for correcting unwanted behavior. [00:02:47] Speaker A: It's called what? Discipline. Yes. [00:02:52] Speaker B: So I know that's what she's trying to do. She's trying to discipline her child. But her strategy, at least in that. [00:02:59] Speaker A: Moment was intense anger and it was. [00:03:04] Speaker B: Like cussing out her kid. It was other threatening language. It was some of these things that just. You just, you witness it and you feel unsettled because, you know, that's not. [00:03:13] Speaker A: The way it's supposed to be. [00:03:15] Speaker B: Even as someone who's blown it as a parent. [00:03:17] Speaker A: Okay. [00:03:19] Speaker B: And I remember, like I was going down, I look over across the table at Mike and we just kind of make eye contact. [00:03:23] Speaker A: And it was just that, like. Oh, like I guess maybe. I guess the emotion would be sadness. Just sadness for that little girl. [00:03:35] Speaker B: And then from there it just kind of progressed, at least internally for me, like sadness for that moment. [00:03:43] Speaker A: Because I'd be willing to bet that that was her experience when she was that age, you know? Yeah. There are times when children need to be disciplined. I think we can all agree that discipline is a necessary thing. But disciplinary moments, they don't have to be like that. [00:04:02] Speaker B: They don't have to be really harsh or even, dare I say, harmful. I remember as a kid I had moments of being disciplined by my parents. [00:04:11] Speaker A: They're in the room, so I probably. [00:04:15] Speaker B: Should have checked with you before I shared. They did a really good job on this one. [00:04:19] Speaker A: Okay, let me just say this one. [00:04:21] Speaker B: I can remember a really formative moment of discipline for me as a child. I'm in elementary school and I don't remember the specifics that I remember what happened, but I don't remember what, like the initial kind of causation. I remember me and my brother were probably like fighting, arguing. We're four and a half years apart, so there was a bit of a struggle in the early years between us and we're kind of probably battling it out. And I remember my parents stepped in to discipline me and to discipline Mark. And it was like, Tom, like kind of calm down, trying to de escalate things. [00:04:50] Speaker A: Go to your room. [00:04:51] Speaker B: And I remember I was really frustrated. I was really angry. I was scheduled to go to a friend's sleepover that evening and I'm angry and I'm acting out and I'm like, I don't wanna listen to my parents. And so we lived in a two story home and I remember I round the corner to go the stairs and I'm trying to be dramatic and I'm. [00:05:11] Speaker A: Probably a fourth or fifth grade boy. [00:05:13] Speaker B: So I'm angry and I have angst and I'm like, ugh, parents don't understand. My brother's a jerk. And I go up the stairs and Mark had this art set that was. [00:05:23] Speaker A: On the Stairway that just happened to be in my path. [00:05:29] Speaker B: Why are you laughing? So I got on my knees and. [00:05:38] Speaker A: I just prayed for my family in that moment. Lord have mercy on them. They know not what they do. [00:05:45] Speaker B: No, dude, I can still remember. I looked down at it and it had like. It was like an art thing where you could draw on it. And it had pencils sticking up and like crayons. Yeah. Kind of like a little mini easel thing. And it was there and it was about this big, you know, and it was off to the side on the stair. I'm going up. [00:06:06] Speaker A: And I looked at it and I just went boom. [00:06:08] Speaker B: And I kicked the thing and it broke. [00:06:13] Speaker A: And then I heard mom and Dad's voice and they sat me down lovingly but sternly. And they explained to me I actually wouldn't be going to that friend's sleepover that evening. [00:06:32] Speaker B: And you guys, I remember I was like, I was crying. I was like, come on, please. Like, I'm sorry. Like, please, I'm supposed to. I want to go to this so bad. Like, ugh. [00:06:44] Speaker A: And I'm sure that was probably hard on them, you know, because you want your kids to have fun and stuff, but they're like, hey, you know, we cannot allow you to go to your friends tonight. [00:06:52] Speaker B: And I just remember that moment. I remember. [00:06:54] Speaker A: Cause it marked me. [00:06:56] Speaker B: And I remember at the time, listen, I remember the time thinking, gosh, my parents are so harsh. Like, at the time, if I'm honest, at the time, I would have probably preferred they just kind of cussed me out and then let me go do. [00:07:09] Speaker A: Whatever I wanted to do. But I look back and I'm like, I'm so thankful for godly discipline because. [00:07:19] Speaker B: I learned a very valuable lesson that day. And that moment I learned that kind. [00:07:27] Speaker A: Of destructive behavior is not tolerated in the Logue family. It's not loving, it's not who I was made to be and not who God would have me to be and who my parents would have me to be. And so thank you, mom and dad. Love you. [00:07:50] Speaker B: Like I said, I know that wasn't easy on them, but it really was. [00:07:53] Speaker A: A formational moment in my life. You see, that's what discipline does. [00:08:01] Speaker B: Discipline, it forms people. It forms people. If it's healthy. If it's healthy discipline, it forms people for the better. Right? It forms people for the better. If it's not healthy, or even worse. [00:08:13] Speaker A: Maybe if it's non existent, it can be harmful. [00:08:19] Speaker B: Today's passage that we're gonna go through. [00:08:20] Speaker A: Here in Matthew, what you're Gonna see. [00:08:22] Speaker B: Is Jesus is gonna give instructions on his process for discipline within his family. [00:08:30] Speaker A: Okay, we're gonna talk today about what. [00:08:32] Speaker B: Discipline within the church looks like. So go ahead and grab your Bible. We're gonna be in Matthew, chapter 18. [00:08:40] Speaker A: You can flip over there. Matthew, chapter 18. [00:08:44] Speaker B: If you're new with us. We've been journeying through Matthew for, I don't know, 35 years, and it's been incredible. We're going slow because there's so much gold here, but the whole purpose with this series. We've titled this series the King and His Kingdom. And what we wanna do is we wanna learn as much as we can about the king of the universe, Jesus and his kingdom, what his rule and reign looks like when I say the kingdom of God. Or maybe you've heard the phrase the kingdom of heaven. Those phrases are synonymous. They mean the same thing. It's talking about what does it look like when God gets his way? That's what we've been exploring for so long here, and that's what we're gonna continue to do. So Matthew, chapter 18. You can put your finger on verse 20, or, I'm sorry, verse 15. We're gonna do verses 15 through 20 today. [00:09:29] Speaker A: And what I want to do is before we read this together, I want to pray for us. I'd love it if you would join me. Let's pray together. Spirit of God, we invite you to teach us this morning. I just want to pray for humility all over the room. I want to pray for humility in the pulpit. It just. There are sensitive things that we're going to talk about this morning. And, God, I don't want pride to get in the way for any of us, especially me. So, Holy Spirit, would you teach us? Would you show us more and more about the beauty of Jesus, about his goodness, about how trustworthy you are? Would you have your way among us? Would you help me to serve these incredible, precious people your way? We want your kingdom, so we pray these things in your name, Jesus, and we all say it together. Amen. [00:10:44] Speaker B: Okay, so really quickly, it's really helpful to understand the context of where we are. [00:10:48] Speaker A: I don't want you to just jump. [00:10:49] Speaker B: In the middle of the movie without knowing where we are. A little context for you. So Jesus here, he's having this teaching moment with his disciples, okay? They're coming to him. They wanna learn. He's teaching them, and he's teaching them about the kingdom of God, the kingdom of heaven. And if you remember, he just got done kind of talking to them about how serious sin is, right? He echoes some of his teaching from his. From the greatest sermon ever, the Sermon on the Mount, he tells him, he says, if your hand or your foot causes you to sin, what should you do with it? [00:11:15] Speaker A: Cut it off. [00:11:17] Speaker B: He goes, if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out. Now, he's not being literal, right? We've talked about this already. He's not being literal. What he's doing is he's exaggerating to. [00:11:25] Speaker A: Make a point, all right? [00:11:27] Speaker B: And the point that he's trying to make is that sin is serious. And hear me, it should be avoided at all costs. Don't flirt with it. Don't give into temptation as much as. [00:11:36] Speaker A: It'S up to you. [00:11:37] Speaker B: If you do sin, practice repentance. That's Jesus whole message, Repent for the kingdom of heaven is near. The whole point, it's like, why the church? One of the big things that the church, the people of God do is they are people who practice repentance over and over and over and over again. Why? Because we're not condemned in our sin. We're free from it. Jesus died. He used his blood and his perfect life in our place to pay for that so that we can be free from it. So that's the whole point, right? So that's Jesus message here. He's going, sin is serious. It should be avoided at all costs. And then he uses this beautiful picture of a flock of a hundred sheep. [00:12:09] Speaker A: Do you remember this? [00:12:11] Speaker B: And he talks about how even he goes, if one sheep goes astray, he's. [00:12:16] Speaker A: Using that as a euphemism for sin. [00:12:18] Speaker B: He goes, our Heavenly Father is like one who leaves the 99 to go after that one sheep who in their sin have gone astray, right? [00:12:29] Speaker A: If you find yourself here this morning, and if you're honest, you're like, I feel that way a little bit. [00:12:35] Speaker B: I feel like I've kind of gone astray from God's purposes for my life or his plan for my life, his leadership in my life. I have really good news for you, okay? [00:12:44] Speaker A: God's passion for you is supreme. He will chase you down with his love and his grace and his mercy to restore you. That's what he's about, okay? He wants you back. Maybe somebody needs to be restored this morning. [00:13:03] Speaker B: So our passage this morning, what it is, it's a continuation of what Jesus has been saying, the seriousness of sin. If your hand or your eye cut it out, gouge it out, like, do whatever it takes to get away from the sin, right? He's continuing this conversation, this teaching, right? About how God pursues that one sheep, Right? And he's going to describe here in our passage of how he actually. You're talking about leaving the 99 for the 1. How does he actually do that? That's what today's passage is all about. This is God's process for discipline in his family. [00:13:39] Speaker A: Okay? [00:13:40] Speaker B: This is God's process for bringing back the sheep who in their sin have gone astray. [00:13:44] Speaker A: You with me? That's the context. Let's read it together. Matthew, chapter 18, starting in verse 15. I'm probably gonna interrupt quite a bit this morning. Read this together. It says this. This is the words of Jesus. [00:14:03] Speaker B: If your brother sins against you, go vent to other people about how frustrated. [00:14:08] Speaker A: You are and how awful your brother is. Your Bible doesn't say that. No. What does it say? If your brother sins against you, go tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, Jesus says. [00:14:32] Speaker B: You have what won your brother. [00:14:36] Speaker A: Okay, pause for a second. [00:14:38] Speaker B: Now, I'm gonna do more like maybe teaching than I typically do, so bear with me. I got quotes for you from smart people. It's really worth noting here in verse 15, if your brother sins, it says against you. The earliest manuscripts that we have of. [00:14:53] Speaker A: The New Testament, it doesn't actually include against you. [00:14:57] Speaker B: That doesn't mean it doesn't apply, but. [00:14:59] Speaker A: It'S much more comprehensive if your brother sins. [00:15:04] Speaker B: Charles Quarles. [00:15:05] Speaker A: I think I gave you guys that quote from Charles Quarles. Yes. Great. Listen to this. This is what he says. Bible scholar. [00:15:13] Speaker B: These verses outline the process. [00:15:15] Speaker A: Get this. [00:15:16] Speaker B: By which disciples demonstrate the Great Shepherd's concern for stray sheep. So the Great Shepherd Jesus has concern for the sheep that are straying in sin, and he uses that. He leverages his people to execute his will and his desires and to basically go public with what he's like, right? So these verses outline the process by which disciples demonstrate the Great Shepherd Jesus's concerns for stray sheep. He continues, the words against you do not appear in the earliest and best. [00:15:47] Speaker A: Manuscripts of verse 15. [00:15:48] Speaker B: Thus, the process is not intended merely for dealing with personal grievances, but rather for any sinful conduct on the part. [00:15:58] Speaker A: Of a Christian brother or sister that. [00:16:00] Speaker B: Indicates such a person is straying from Christ. The purpose of the process is. [00:16:07] Speaker A: Listen to. This is not to punish, but to restore the sinful disciple. [00:16:14] Speaker B: Raise your hand in this room if. [00:16:15] Speaker A: You'Re a disciple of Jesus and you're sinful. [00:16:17] Speaker B: Oh, cool. All of us just want to make sure that there's not like the holy crew and the unholy. No, no, no. We all fall short of the glory of God. We all need the blood of Jesus to cleanse us. [00:16:25] Speaker A: Can I get an amen? [00:16:26] Speaker B: So we cannot allow pride to fester. [00:16:28] Speaker A: In the room right now. [00:16:30] Speaker B: This is not like those people thing. It's an us thing. [00:16:34] Speaker A: You with me? Okay. [00:16:35] Speaker B: So this process that we're about to go through here, it can include other Christians sinning against you? Absolutely. But it's not limited to just like conflict resolution. Now, verse 15, it tells us both the goal of Jesus process and the first step of Jesus process for discipline. Did you catch what the goal was? Verse 15. It's step one and the whole goal. Winning your brother. Right. To win your brother or your sister back. The one stray sheep. [00:17:13] Speaker A: Right? [00:17:13] Speaker B: And we all take turns. [00:17:14] Speaker A: That's basically what happens. [00:17:17] Speaker B: That's the goal. So the goal here is restored unity. That's the goal. The goal here is reconciliation between primarily, but not exclusively primarily, between that person. [00:17:29] Speaker A: And who and God. [00:17:32] Speaker B: It's about primarily their relationship between them and God and that person and God's people. So it's a comprehensive reconciliation. It's a vertical reconciliation and a horizontal reconciliation. [00:17:45] Speaker A: You tracking with me? That's the goal. All right, How? Through repentance. [00:17:52] Speaker B: This word repentance keeps coming up in Matthew because it's Jesus message. [00:17:55] Speaker A: Repent because the kingdom of God isn't near. [00:17:57] Speaker B: John the Baptist did it before him. Right? Repentance, it's this concept of I love Jesus is the best teacher ever, is he not? His picture of the flock of God, the sheep, and the one going astray. Repentance is coming back. It's turning. [00:18:14] Speaker A: Right. [00:18:15] Speaker B: We've talked about this so much, but we can't lose sight of this because it's a critical component in the life. [00:18:20] Speaker A: Of a follower of Jesus. [00:18:21] Speaker B: It's your walk, your straying and your sin, and you come back to the flock and to the great Shepherd. Right, through repentance. [00:18:30] Speaker A: That's what it is. [00:18:31] Speaker B: Now keep that context in your mind, because Jesus painted this picture of the flock of God, the sheep that have strayed away from living God's way. All right, so if you're taking notes, step one in Jesus process for how to deal with sin in the life of a fellow Christian is this. Step one. [00:18:52] Speaker A: Go to them and only them, and humbly let them know. Go to them and only them and. [00:19:03] Speaker B: Humbly let them know. That's step one. About 10 years ago. [00:19:15] Speaker A: Somebody I really love and care about, they were in A challenging season in their life, and. [00:19:26] Speaker B: They were making some decisions that weren't consistent with their beliefs. [00:19:32] Speaker A: They were making some decisions, and there. [00:19:34] Speaker B: Were some behaviors in their life that. [00:19:35] Speaker A: Were. [00:19:40] Speaker B: Let'S just say, not good for them or anybody else. [00:19:42] Speaker A: Okay, I'm gonna leave the details out of it, but I think you catch my drift. And we all have done that. [00:19:48] Speaker B: But the person I love, this has happened in their life. [00:19:51] Speaker A: And talking to them hit them up. [00:19:54] Speaker B: We connected, and I just shared my heart. [00:19:57] Speaker A: I'm like, hey, man, I really love you. You know I love you. Can we talk just about some of this stuff that I'm seeing? And. And. [00:20:05] Speaker B: Cause I would want you to tell. [00:20:06] Speaker A: Me, I care about you. I love you. [00:20:09] Speaker B: I would want you to tell me. [00:20:10] Speaker A: So I feel like, in love. I wanna talk to you about this. Can we talk about this? [00:20:15] Speaker B: And at first he was kinda like, defensive, kind of like explaining, kind of justifying it, you know? And the more we talked about it, actually, he kinda started to downplay it. [00:20:26] Speaker A: Just a little bit. But as the conversation went on, kinda. [00:20:31] Speaker B: All of a sudden, guys, he just. [00:20:34] Speaker A: Starts breaking down real tears. [00:20:39] Speaker B: Real, like it was real. [00:20:41] Speaker A: I was like, whoa, I didn't expect that. And then guess what he said to me? He goes, tom, I'm so lonely. And I was like, what? I mean, guys, this guy, listen, he's. [00:21:06] Speaker B: The kind of person that a lot of people look up to, okay? He's got a wildly impressive resume. He's. You ever meet somebody who's intimidatingly cool? Like, I've been to, I've been in. I can't think of a room that I've been in with him where he's. [00:21:28] Speaker A: Not the coolest guy in the room. [00:21:30] Speaker B: I know that sounds, like, weird, but I'm just being honest. I mean, just like, extremely influential. Thousands of followers, countless contacts in his phone, you know, scrolling through his contact list, countless people in his contact list in his phone. [00:21:44] Speaker A: And yet in tears, Tom, I'm so lonely. And I remember being kind of confused by it. And then it dawned on me. He had plenty of worldly friends. What he lacked was biblical friends. [00:22:07] Speaker B: Christian loves Jesus, man. What he lacked was biblical friends. Friends who cared enough about him to talk to him about his spiritual well being. [00:22:20] Speaker A: Of course he was lonely. Listen, worldly friends are different than biblical friends. [00:22:33] Speaker B: They just are. I'm not throwing shade. [00:22:36] Speaker A: I'm just reporting the news. [00:22:39] Speaker B: Worldly friends are different than biblical friends. Biblical friends don't just connect on superficial levels. They don't just connect on the surface level. They can connect in those ways. And it's beautiful, and it's fun and it's great. [00:22:49] Speaker A: It's not bad. [00:22:50] Speaker B: But they don't just connect on superficial or surface levels. They connect on a soul level. [00:23:00] Speaker A: Worldly friends. [00:23:00] Speaker B: What happens is worldly friends inevitably end up using each other. Using each other, like for companionship. Cause life gets lonely, man. Last thing you want to do is be alone. What did God say in the garden? It's not good for man to be alone, of course. And so it's like, I don't want to be alone, so let me find somebody else who doesn't want to be alone. And we can just kind of like, I'm not alone. You're not alone. We have companionship. That's cool. Worldly friends can use each other for fun. [00:23:35] Speaker A: You're fun. [00:23:36] Speaker B: We like to do the same thing. So cool. We're fun. It's great entertainment, whatever. [00:23:40] Speaker A: Why? [00:23:41] Speaker B: Cause the last thing we want to. [00:23:42] Speaker A: Do is live a boring life. Battling loneliness. Battling boredom. [00:23:49] Speaker B: Here's one that's a little bit more obvious, but it still happens. Worldly friends, they use each other for access to resources. [00:23:58] Speaker A: Whether it be like, I don't know, wisdom, this person's wise. I want to tap into that social status. This person's a big deal. They're impressive. [00:24:09] Speaker B: If I'm close to them, that means my impressive meter goes up a little bit, right? [00:24:13] Speaker A: Like. [00:24:15] Speaker B: Wisdom, social status, money, other influential relationships, networking, all that, whatever, right? You guys know what I'm talking about. [00:24:22] Speaker A: Most of us in this room have. [00:24:23] Speaker B: Either seen it happen or experienced it or whatever. And youth. It applies to you guys too. [00:24:30] Speaker A: You want to be friends with the cool kids, right? With the influential kids. The problem with worldly friendships is that they're fickle. They're fickle. What do I mean by that? If someone more fun or more connected or more impressive or more wise or. [00:24:53] Speaker B: More cool, or someone with more resources. [00:24:55] Speaker A: Comes along, well, then guess where the attention shifts to. I'm not getting called anymore or whatever. No wonder people are so lonely. Some of you know exactly what I'm talking about. Some of you are lonely, man. Some of you are lonely because you lack biblical friendships. Not cause you're not wonderful, not because you're not valuable, not because you're not worth spending time with. If the gospel teaches us anything, if the blood of Christ teaches us anything, it teaches us of your value. But some of you are lonely because you lack biblical friendships. Hear me. Even in the church. [00:25:59] Speaker B: So allow me to just quickly, I'm. [00:26:01] Speaker A: Only one verse in Buckle up. [00:26:03] Speaker B: Allow me to paraphrase for you. Verse 15. This is the Tom Logue translation. Okay? This is my paraphrase of verse 15. If your brother or sister sins, be. [00:26:15] Speaker A: Their friend and go to them about it. Worldly friends are different than biblical friends. [00:26:24] Speaker B: You know, when you go to the store, you go to the store and typically they'll have aisles and there's different things on the shelves, right? Where do they put the best stuff? [00:26:37] Speaker A: Higher. Right? They don't put the best stuff on the bottom shelf. They put the best stuff on the upper shelves. [00:26:45] Speaker B: Dare I say on the top shelf? [00:26:46] Speaker A: Okay, the top shelf. [00:26:48] Speaker B: The best stuff is on the top shelf. [00:26:50] Speaker A: Listen to me. [00:26:50] Speaker B: You can pursue all the kind of friendships you like. There's so many options for you. It's good, it's great. I'm not trying to dissuade you from having necessarily. Even connecting with people on superficial levels or surface levels, all that's great. It's fun. Entertainment's not bad. Making memories isn't bad. It's great. But hear me, you can pursue all the kinds of friendships in your life, but I'm here to tell you, biblical. [00:27:11] Speaker A: Friends are top shelf friends. [00:27:13] Speaker B: It doesn't get any better than that. Top shelf friends. [00:27:17] Speaker A: Listen, if you have people. I need you to hear me for just a second, okay? [00:27:22] Speaker B: If you have people in your life that move towards you to help you. [00:27:29] Speaker A: With your sin and you resist them, or worse, you reject that, I'm here. [00:27:38] Speaker B: To tell you you're resisting and you're rejecting top shelf friends like the best you could have. [00:27:45] Speaker A: You hear me? I felt a lot of conviction with this. This week I sleep next to one. [00:27:53] Speaker B: And I oftentimes dismiss the way that. [00:27:56] Speaker A: She wants to help me with my sin, not just have fun together, although I love having fun with you. Biblical friends are top shelf friends. [00:28:09] Speaker B: Listen, if you. [00:28:10] Speaker A: I said if you have that and you're rejecting it, you know you're rejecting top shelf. If you don't have a biblical friend, can I just encourage you be the friend that you wish you had? What did Jesus say? He said, do to others the way that you would have them do to you. Right? I'm just stealing Jesus. [00:28:29] Speaker B: Proverbs 18:24. One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin. [00:28:37] Speaker A: But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. [00:28:40] Speaker B: Proverbs 27:6. Faithful are the wounds of a friend. [00:28:46] Speaker A: Verse 15 is talking about friendship. Biblical friendship. [00:28:51] Speaker B: Not friendship where we use one another. Friendship where we're pursuing what's best for. [00:28:54] Speaker A: The other person because we actually love Them. You with me? [00:28:57] Speaker B: All right, so to reiterate, step one in that process of how to deal with sin in the life of a fellow Christian, go to them and only them and humbly let them know. And again, the whole point here, it's not shame and condemnation, right? It's you want freedom for your friend, you want freedom for your brother and sister. Freedom from what? Freedom from sin and its effects and its damage and its destructive nature. Right. How? [00:29:21] Speaker A: Through repentance. [00:29:23] Speaker B: We're all practicing repentance together. [00:29:24] Speaker A: That's what we do. That's what the church is. Right. [00:29:27] Speaker B: It's Jesus message. Repent for the kingdom of heaven is near. And hear me, repentance. It doesn't just deal with the fruit in your life, it deals with the root that is producing that fruit. What do I mean by that? Repentance. It's not just like a behavior modification, stop lying. It's not that. Yes, you will inevitably stop lying if you practice repentance. But it's not just about the fruit. Repentance is primarily about the root. Right? So it's not just behavior modification. It's worship restoration. Because there's a reason why we sin. And the reason why we sin is because of what's going on in us. In a heart level. The Bible talks about how we worship idols. We ascribe ultimate worth. [00:30:08] Speaker A: That's what worship means. [00:30:09] Speaker B: We ascribe ultimate worth to things that actually are not intended to be gods in our life. Things like comfort. Can I get an amen? How many people like to live a comfortable life? That's why you live in Temecula, right? [00:30:20] Speaker A: Yes. [00:30:21] Speaker B: Now listen, comfort's not a bad thing. But it can't be a God thing. It can't be the thing that we worship that we ascribe ultimate worth to. We build our whole life around being comfortable. Cause then guess what? We're bowing down to a different altar. We might sing jesus, you're awesome, but in our hearts we're going comfort, you're awesome. Comfort, you're great. Comfort, I love you. [00:30:42] Speaker A: Comfort. [00:30:43] Speaker B: Control, power, approval of people. I want to do whatever I can to get you to like me. I want to do whatever I can to preserve my reputation. So you think highly of me. And in the process, what I'm doing is I'm using you for approval. [00:30:53] Speaker A: I'm not loving you. You with me. [00:30:56] Speaker B: So it's not just about the fruit in your life, the behavior. It's not just the stop lying. It's the repent of the false God that you're Worshiping that's causing you to lie. [00:31:07] Speaker A: You with me? Repentance deals with worship. It's a turning away of idolatry. Now, if this chapter, which good God, Mike and I were talking about, this Matthew 18, is just loaded. But if this chapter teaches us anything. [00:31:25] Speaker B: It'S that God is serious about preserving unity. And hear me, purity among his people. When I say purity, I don't mean that you've never sinned. I mean that you're fleeing from sin with everything you got. [00:31:39] Speaker A: And not just you. We. So I want you to understand that. [00:31:45] Speaker B: The big idea here, it's not about policing each other. [00:31:50] Speaker A: It's not about, like, there's those guys on Winchester at the corner with the guns, the bike cops that just wait there to ticket you. That's not what we're doing. It's not about policing each other. It's about protecting each other, guys. [00:32:05] Speaker B: Cause Satan is real. Sin is real, and it will destroy you. [00:32:12] Speaker A: I'll leave that alone. You guys know where I'm going. It'll harm your life. [00:32:15] Speaker B: So step one in Jesus process, go to them and only them, and humbly let them know. What does this mean? This means you actually put words on it, right? It means you actually talk to them about it humbly. Cause none of us are perfect. And here's what it doesn't mean. Step one does not mean we brush. [00:32:30] Speaker A: It under the rug. [00:32:31] Speaker B: Just let it go. Brush it under the rug. [00:32:34] Speaker A: It's uncomfortable. [00:32:35] Speaker B: It's awkward to talk to people I care about about their sin or about what I see in them or the. [00:32:39] Speaker A: Way they've hurt me or whatever. [00:32:41] Speaker B: No, it doesn't mean you brush it under the rug. Unless we actually don't love them. Unless we actually don't love them. And if that's the case. [00:32:52] Speaker A: Then we're straying just as much as anybody else, right? We're called to love one another. I don't want to move on from that. We're called to love one another. None of us do it perfectly, huh? But I'm here to tell you it's one of the. It's part of your purpose. [00:33:20] Speaker B: It's part of your purpose to love. [00:33:22] Speaker A: Others and to be loved by them. Do you remember what Jesus said in John 13? As I've loved you, love one another. Your maker, your creator, the one who. [00:33:32] Speaker B: Knows you better than you know yourself better than anybody else, knows you, who loves you better than anybody else does. [00:33:38] Speaker A: Cause I want you to love other people the way that I love you. [00:33:40] Speaker B: It's part of who we are as. [00:33:42] Speaker A: Christians, it's part of what we're called to. [00:33:44] Speaker B: So we don't hold it in. We don't, like, stew on it. Especially if you're sinned against. That can get messy real quick, man. [00:33:51] Speaker A: Like, think about it. I think you'll all know what I'm talking about. [00:33:58] Speaker B: Someone you experience or you encounter somebody else's sin in such a way that. [00:34:03] Speaker A: It bothers you, okay? [00:34:05] Speaker B: It bothers you. [00:34:06] Speaker A: And then you don't say anything about it. You just kind of stew on it, right? [00:34:10] Speaker B: You just kind of, like, hold it in. You just kind of think about it and it bothers you, and it increasingly bothers you, and you find yourself. It keeps coming. [00:34:16] Speaker A: You know what I mean? [00:34:17] Speaker B: It's like it just keeps coming at your mind. [00:34:22] Speaker A: Hear me? If we do that, it's only a matter of time until that leads to bitterness. [00:34:29] Speaker B: Like it's gonna happen if you just stew on it. You don't address it. [00:34:36] Speaker A: It's only a matter of time until it leads to bitterness. [00:34:38] Speaker B: Bitterness is like poison. It's poison in the human heart. It eats away at you. I've seen bitterness destroy people. I've seen bitterness destroy. [00:34:47] Speaker A: Not destroy churches, but harm churches. [00:34:50] Speaker B: It's only a matter of time until. [00:34:52] Speaker A: That bitterness that is poisoning you, then when it's shared, poisons other people. Hebrews 12:15 says, the root of bitterness defiles many. So think about that. [00:35:07] Speaker B: The writer in the Hebrews, he's describing bitterness almost as like a poisonous contagion. [00:35:13] Speaker A: So contagion. [00:35:14] Speaker B: Think, like really contagious disease, right? Like, highly. [00:35:20] Speaker A: You don't share poison, right? [00:35:22] Speaker B: Like, think about, like, if somebody that you are in relationship with, if they have a really bad case of the flu, like, I'm talking, their body aches all over. There's stuff coming out from both ends. It's nasty. It's getting awful. They feel terrible. They feel like they're gonna die. Someone's in that kind of condition, they're hurting bad, bad. You don't want them to sneeze in your face. Right? [00:35:48] Speaker A: Thank you. I'm trying to be ridiculous right now. [00:35:52] Speaker B: But, like, for real, you don't. [00:35:53] Speaker A: Why? [00:35:53] Speaker B: Because you don't want to share that. Ugh. It's going to be bad. You don't want to barf too. Like, no. [00:36:05] Speaker A: If there's bitterness in your heart towards a brother or sister, for the love of God, don't share it. It's good for no one. Bitterness is good for no one. [00:36:21] Speaker B: You ever thought about this? [00:36:22] Speaker A: I think about this often partially because of the role of bless you. No worries. Have you ever thought about, like, if. [00:36:37] Speaker B: You were Satan and you wanted to. [00:36:39] Speaker A: I don't know, destroy a church, what would you do? [00:36:44] Speaker B: Like, part of, like, our reality as Christians is we are in the middle. [00:36:46] Speaker A: Of warfare all the time. [00:36:47] Speaker B: There's a war over your soul. [00:36:49] Speaker A: Okay. [00:36:49] Speaker B: If you have an enemy, sometimes some of the wisest things that you can do in warfare is what would the enemy do? If Satan wanted to destroy our church. [00:36:59] Speaker A: What do you think he would do? [00:37:03] Speaker B: I'll give you an example. I believe this is what he would do. I believe what he would do is he would tempt one Christian. He would tempt one Christian to harbor bitterness in their heart towards another fellow brother or sister, and then to share that poison with others. Because the moment you start to harbor the bitterness is the moment you start to put on pride, which is the sheep is now straying, right? [00:37:24] Speaker A: Pride's a sin, kind of the root of all sin, but either way. So one sheep starts straying, and now I'm gonna share the poison, and another sheep starts straying, and another sheep starts. [00:37:33] Speaker B: Straying, and the next thing you know, sheep after sheep are moving farther away from the shepherd. [00:37:38] Speaker A: You with me? [00:37:38] Speaker B: And now I'm not talking about me. [00:37:40] Speaker A: I'm talking about Jesus. [00:37:43] Speaker B: And I'll be honest with you, I've watched this happen. I've seen it happen. [00:37:46] Speaker A: It's devastating. [00:37:48] Speaker B: In the last 20 years, by God's grace, I've pastored in four churches, three of them restored church plants. [00:37:55] Speaker A: And I got stories, man. Some are beautiful, some are not. I've seen awful things. [00:38:01] Speaker B: I've seen how destructive bitterness can be. And hear me, it typically, not always. [00:38:07] Speaker A: But it typically is bitterness towards leadership in the church. One of the pastors, one of the leaders, one of the deacons, one of the gospel community leaders. [00:38:15] Speaker B: And that bitterness starts to fester and starts to foster. [00:38:19] Speaker A: Now, like I said, in my experience, it's not going to be everybody's experience. It's typically towards leaders in the church, but it's not limited to leaders. I've watched the word of God not return void. I've watched the root of bitterness defile. [00:38:35] Speaker B: Many, and it caused damage and hurt and destruction in all of their lives. [00:38:42] Speaker A: Bitterness is a poisonous contagion, and Satan knows it. Guard your heart, man. I'm only on point three, so. Or point one, so we don't brush sin under the rug when we see it in a brother or sister. [00:38:56] Speaker B: We don't hold on it and stew on it. We don't leave room for bitterness to grow, we go to them and only. [00:39:01] Speaker A: Them, and humbly let them know. You with me. I'm gonna move way faster. [00:39:05] Speaker B: Okay, Matthew 18. [00:39:06] Speaker A: Let's go to verse 16. Next verse. [00:39:11] Speaker B: But if he won't listen, so you've gone to him and him alone. If he won't listen, take one or two others with you. [00:39:16] Speaker A: Underline one or two others. [00:39:18] Speaker B: We're gonna come back to that. [00:39:19] Speaker A: It's really important. [00:39:20] Speaker B: Take one or two others with you so that by the testimony of two or three witnesses, every fact may be established. Note takers, step number two in Jesus process for how to deal with sin in the life of a fellow Christian. [00:39:33] Speaker A: You go to them with step one. [00:39:34] Speaker B: If they still refuse to repent, take one or two Christians with you and. [00:39:37] Speaker A: Try again humbly, in love, in care. [00:39:41] Speaker B: For them, in a desire to be close to them and a desire for them to thrive as a person. Right again, same goal. Same goal. Restoration through repentance for the sake of unity and purity in the church. [00:39:53] Speaker A: Let's Keep reading verse 17. [00:39:56] Speaker B: If he doesn't pay attention to them. [00:39:58] Speaker A: The original person and the one or two others. [00:40:00] Speaker B: So that's two or three people, right? [00:40:01] Speaker A: That's mass. You with me? [00:40:04] Speaker B: If he doesn't pay attention to them, tell the church. If he doesn't pay attention to even the church, let him be like a. [00:40:12] Speaker A: Gentile and a tax collector to you. [00:40:16] Speaker B: Whoa. Jesus just turned the heat up big time. Okay, that word church in the New. [00:40:25] Speaker A: Testament, it's the Greek word ekklesia. [00:40:29] Speaker B: In its simplest form. [00:40:30] Speaker A: What it means is, it means assembly. [00:40:32] Speaker B: So an assembly of people, people assembling together. [00:40:34] Speaker A: Okay. [00:40:36] Speaker B: One of, I think probably the best. [00:40:39] Speaker A: Greek to English lexicon of the New Testament. [00:40:41] Speaker B: Johannes Liu and Eugene Nidda say this. [00:40:44] Speaker A: If you guys can pull up this quote from the Greek to English lexicon of the New Testament. Do you guys have it? Yes. Perfect. [00:40:51] Speaker B: They're talking about this word ekklesia that's. [00:40:53] Speaker A: Translated to church means assembly. This is what they say. [00:40:55] Speaker B: The term ekklesia was in common usage for several hundred years before the Christian era and was used to refer to an assembly of persons constituted by well defined membership. So a Christian ekklesia is the localized assembly of Christians for whom they are all aware of who is a member and who is not yet a member. [00:41:25] Speaker A: You with me? This is one of the reasons why we are convinced that the Church of God is the family of God. [00:41:33] Speaker B: In the same way, you know who's. [00:41:36] Speaker A: In your household family, you know who. [00:41:38] Speaker B: Your daughters are, you know who your sons are, you Know who your mom and dad is. You know who your brothers are like, you know that that's essentially what's. [00:41:44] Speaker A: That's the heartbeat of what's being communicated here. Okay? [00:41:48] Speaker B: An ecclesia Christian Ecclesia is a localized assembly of Christians for whom they are all aware who is a member and. [00:41:54] Speaker A: Who is not our church. What does that mean for us? Let's contextualize for just a second. Restored Temecula. [00:41:59] Speaker B: We are a collection of Christians, yes, But we are a collection of what. [00:42:03] Speaker A: We call gospel communities. Gospel communities. [00:42:06] Speaker B: They are a collection of households that are following Jesus together in intentional, meaning, meaningful ways. The vast majority of you in the room, you know what I'm talking about because you're in a gospel community. If you're not, I'm so glad you're here. We want to help you understand how. [00:42:18] Speaker A: Our church operates, okay? [00:42:19] Speaker B: GC A collection of households following Jesus in intentional and meaningful ways. So what you need to know about gospel communities is Gospel communities are made. [00:42:28] Speaker A: Up of members of Restored Temecula. All right? [00:42:32] Speaker B: That's people who have gone through the intro phase of gospel community, dare I. [00:42:37] Speaker A: Say the membership process of Restored Temecula. [00:42:39] Speaker B: So they've gone through that intro phase. They come out of it and make a decision that they're all on the same page together. They're committed to the same shared rule of life together. [00:42:47] Speaker A: That just means commitments in the way they live their life together. Right? [00:42:51] Speaker B: That's how our church is structured. That's how our church operates. And the reason it operates that way is not because I think it's a great idea, Mike or Herrick thinks it's a great idea, or the deacons think. [00:42:59] Speaker A: It'S a great idea. [00:43:00] Speaker B: It's because we're convinced that that's what the Bible says, how we should operate. [00:43:04] Speaker A: But I want you to understand that when we're alluding to this conversation around membership to. [00:43:11] Speaker B: There's a distinction here between membership to the global body of Christ, the big C church. There's billions of people who are members of the global body of Christ all throughout the world. There's billions of people who are members of the global body of Christ that are not members of this ekklesia. [00:43:29] Speaker A: You with me? [00:43:32] Speaker B: This unique assembly of Christians constituted by. [00:43:36] Speaker A: A well defined membership. It's my long way of saying Restored Temecula is an ecclesia. Okay? [00:43:45] Speaker B: If you're interested in church membership with this ecclesia, I want to encourage you to sign up for the intro to Gospel community. [00:43:50] Speaker A: Learn a lot more there. I'm sure There'll be plenty of people who would love to share their positive experience of it with you. [00:43:55] Speaker B: Now, I had to touch on that in verse 17. Verse 17 also tells us step three in the process. Process step three in the process for how to deal with sin. Jesus process for how to deal with. [00:44:06] Speaker A: Sin in the life of a fellow Christians is at that point you've done. [00:44:09] Speaker B: It one on one, you've grabbed a couple more. So now it's two on three. Making an appeal to them to repent. [00:44:13] Speaker A: Right. [00:44:14] Speaker B: If they still won't. [00:44:17] Speaker A: The next step, step three is inform the ecclesia. [00:44:22] Speaker B: Inform the ecclesia. And this is exactly what it sounds like. Kind of awkward. [00:44:28] Speaker A: For everyone. [00:44:30] Speaker B: This is Jesus words. This is not my opinion. This is Jesus words. It's exactly what it sounds like. It'd be something like this. [00:44:38] Speaker A: Hey, church, you need to be aware that there have been multiple attempts to call. I'm not going to put names in this. [00:44:47] Speaker B: To call blank to repentance for. [00:44:53] Speaker A: And thus far there's been resistance, there's been some rejection, there's been some refusal, there's been some disagreement. [00:45:00] Speaker B: Well, you're doing this and that. [00:45:01] Speaker A: It's just not going the way we want it to go or the way we believe God would lead us to have it go. And repentance has not taken place yet. So now we're informing you why? So that you can join in the effort of loving them, pursuing them, serving them, inviting them, calling them to what? It starts with an R. Good job. Repentance. [00:45:28] Speaker B: That's the gig, guys. [00:45:35] Speaker A: The goal hasn't changed. It's to win your brother and sister back through repentance. And again, that repentance is not just behavior modification. It's all about this. It's about heart transformation. It's about redirecting your worship back to him. Okay, if you're anything like me, this would kind of promote and provoke a question. [00:46:05] Speaker B: Can a person be a Christian without. [00:46:07] Speaker A: Having a well defined membership to an Ekklesia? People have strong takes on this on both sides. [00:46:16] Speaker B: The answer? [00:46:17] Speaker A: I think it's possible. [00:46:20] Speaker B: I think it's possible to be a Christian without a well defined membership to ekklesia. Right? Because things happen in life. [00:46:28] Speaker A: And here's what I mean by that. You move, you relocate. [00:46:33] Speaker B: Sam and Jenna are relocating here in a couple weeks. I'm sure they're gonna go through a process where they don't have a clearly defined membership relationship to a local church. Makes perfect sense. They're in transition, right? You read the New Testament. These men and Women were put in prison. If you get locked up for an extended amount of time and you have no contact with people, that's gonna be really tough, right? So yes, I think there are circumstances for which, yes, a person can be. [00:47:04] Speaker A: A Christian without having a well defined. [00:47:06] Speaker B: Membership to an ecclesia. [00:47:08] Speaker A: But hear me, this is serious. [00:47:10] Speaker B: There's not one example in the New Testament of a Christian who is intentionally detached from a clearly defined relationship to an ecclesia. [00:47:19] Speaker A: You won't find one. So my encouragement for all of us, if you don't have like a clearly defined relationship with the church, like an ekklesia, pursue it. I promise you it will be one of the best decisions you've ever made in your life. Alright? [00:47:39] Speaker B: Step three in that process, like I. [00:47:41] Speaker A: Said, if they still refuse to repent, inform the ekklesia. Finally, step four, we saw it already, it's intense. Jesus says if step one doesn't work, you go to them one on one, you alone. Step two doesn't work, you bring a couple other people with you. Now there's two or three people. If that doesn't work, step three, you inform the ekklesia. [00:48:06] Speaker B: If that still doesn't work, Jesus says step four is treat the unrepentant person. [00:48:11] Speaker A: As an outsider until they repent. John D. Barry, I have a quote for you. I'm gonna give you a couple quotes here. John D. Barry says this. [00:48:29] Speaker B: In the narratives Jewish context, Gentiles and tax collectors would be regarded as outsiders. This instruction to cut ties with the unrepentant sinner is intended to remove sin. [00:48:42] Speaker A: From the local group of believers. Jesus wants a pure bride. [00:48:49] Speaker B: DA Carson says this Jesus regularly treats Gentiles and tax collectors with remarkable compassion. [00:48:59] Speaker A: But he does not treat them as disciples until they repent. [00:49:03] Speaker B: The removal of fellowship depicted here does not listen to this. This is crucial. The removal of fellowship depicted here does not mean having no further contact with a person. [00:49:14] Speaker A: Rather it means not allowing them to retain positions reserved for Christians until they repent. Let me just say this and then I want to give an example from the Bible of how this played out. You guys are incredible. You guys are a remarkable community of people. What makes you remarkable primarily is God's spirit among you at work in you. [00:49:42] Speaker B: As an individual, at work in your. [00:49:44] Speaker A: Marriages, at work in your parenting, at work in your families, at work in your friendships and your relationships and all these things. [00:49:49] Speaker B: You guys are amazing. You are a community that is worth guarding and protecting. [00:49:55] Speaker A: And hear me, you're a community that would be worth pursuing access to for A lot of different reasons, some of. [00:50:06] Speaker B: Them even worldly reasons. [00:50:11] Speaker A: I want to show you. [00:50:12] Speaker B: Flip over to 1 Corinthians really quickly. [00:50:14] Speaker A: I'm almost done. [00:50:16] Speaker B: There's an example of Jesus process here. [00:50:19] Speaker A: For church discipline, family discipline. [00:50:23] Speaker B: There's an example from First Corinthians that I think is worth drawing to your attention. First Corinthians, chapter 5, verses 9 through 13. I'm going to give you the background here. A man is engaging in sexual immorality. [00:50:36] Speaker A: Okay? [00:50:36] Speaker B: A man of the church, like member of the church engaging in sexual immorality. And he does not repent. Check out what Paul writes in verse. [00:50:44] Speaker A: Starting in verse nine. [00:50:45] Speaker B: Yes, I wrote to you. He's literally writing to Christians in the city of Corinth. The church, the people, the ecclesias. Right. I wrote to you in a letter not to associate with sexually immoral people. [00:50:56] Speaker A: Listen to this. [00:50:57] Speaker B: I did not mean the immoral people of this world or the greedy and swindlers or idolaters. Otherwise you would have to leave the world. So he's drawing a distinction between non Christians and Christians. Verse 11. But actually I wrote you not to associate with anyone who claims to be. [00:51:16] Speaker A: A brother or sister and is sexually immoral or greedy. An idolater or verbally abusive, a drunkard or a swindler. [00:51:28] Speaker B: Do not even eat with such a person. Paraphrase the unrepentant person. You've practiced Matthew 18. You've practiced Jesus, his process. The unrepentant person goes, no more Lord's suppers for them. [00:51:42] Speaker A: No more Gospel community for them. [00:51:44] Speaker B: He goes, don't even eat with such a person. He's talking. He's referencing the Lord's Supper, verse 12. For what business is it of mine to judge outsiders? [00:51:54] Speaker A: He goes, don't you judge those who are inside? God judges outsiders. Listen to what he says. [00:52:02] Speaker B: This is like fathering. [00:52:03] Speaker A: He goes, remove the evil person from among you. Let's breathe, because this is intense. So this is Matthew 18, Jesus process playing out in the church of Corinth. [00:52:23] Speaker B: Paul is saying what Jesus is saying. [00:52:26] Speaker A: He's saying to live in unrepentant sin is to forfeit access to the ekklesia. Remember, what's the goal? To win your brother and your sister back. [00:52:40] Speaker B: The one sheep that's gone astray. Go get em. Bring them back. Sometimes you can't forcefully bring people back, but you can pray your face off. You can still pursue without giving them access to the thing that they forfeited. [00:52:59] Speaker A: That's the goal. [00:52:59] Speaker B: The goal is to bring your brother or sister. [00:53:01] Speaker A: Back to repentance. Fast forward to Second Corinthians now. Second Corinthians, chapter 12. I want you to see how this thing plays out. [00:53:05] Speaker B: Because they did this. The church did this. They followed Jesus lordship and how to handle this. And then they exercise that church discipline on this guy. Check out 2 Corinthians, chapter 2, verses 5 through 8. [00:53:18] Speaker A: I'm gonna read it. If anyone has caused pain, we can all agree sin causes pain. [00:53:24] Speaker B: He has caused pain not so much to me, but to some degree. Not to exaggerate to all of you, verse 6. This punishment by the majority, he's referencing. [00:53:33] Speaker A: Literally that act of church discipline. [00:53:36] Speaker B: This punishment by the majority is sufficient for that person. As a result, you should instead forgive and comfort him. [00:53:49] Speaker A: Do you know who he's talking about? He's talking about the same dude from 1 Corinthians chapter 5 that they removed. [00:53:56] Speaker B: Same guy. And Paul's saying, as a result, you should instead forgive and comfort him. Otherwise he may be overwhelmed by excessive grief. Therefore, I urge you to reaffirm your love to him. Who else lives this way? [00:54:19] Speaker A: Oh, wait, nobody lives this way. World says, you've wronged me. [00:54:32] Speaker B: See ya for good. [00:54:34] Speaker A: I'm done. I'm out. Or how about this? [00:54:39] Speaker B: This is a phrase I've regrettably used. [00:54:41] Speaker A: In my own life and in my heart. I'm over it. Not the people of God, not the family of God. Why? Because our king doesn't do that with us, does he? Not once Jesus knows what he's talking about, friends. [00:54:58] Speaker B: So we see a case of church discipline go through all four steps. [00:55:04] Speaker A: And then it results in restoration. God's way works even if we don't agree. [00:55:10] Speaker B: God's way works even if it doesn't totally make sense to us. Now, I think it's important really quickly. [00:55:16] Speaker A: To note who is executing the church discipline here. Say it. [00:55:27] Speaker B: The ekklesia. [00:55:30] Speaker A: The ecclesia is doing this. [00:55:31] Speaker B: It's not like, man, Tom's really controlling or Mike's on a power trip or hurricane. They just want to, like, control. No, this is not a me thing. This is a we thing. This is what the people of God do. Why? [00:55:44] Speaker A: Because we love one another. We love one another. [00:55:48] Speaker B: It's a collective effort throughout the process. Yes, elders and leaders involved, but it's the work of the ecclesia. Why? For the sake of the soul of the person caught up in that unrepentant sin. They're in a spider web and they don't know it and it's gonna wreck their life. It's for that one sheep that's going astray. Jesus said, I'll leave the 99 cause I want that one too. He cares. We gotta care too. [00:56:12] Speaker A: Let me give you one more quote for you. Augsburger in Ogilvy says this Bible scholars. [00:56:20] Speaker B: Quote, if the offender will not hear the church, then he is to be excommunicated and regarded as a sinner. For he is deliberately choosing to remain in his sin. The third step is the binding and loosing process of the church. It is not done simply by the leaders as authority figures for the entire community is responsible to act and maintain a disciplined church. There are two. I love this part. There are two reasons for discipline. One, for the sake of the erring person, in that his brothers and sisters care enough to help him to correction, holding him accountable to his commitments. And two, for the sake of the integrity of the church and its witness as the community of Christ. [00:57:08] Speaker A: Listen to this. Where there is no discipline, there is no true church. Roundhouse to the chin. Where there is no discipline, there is no true church. My paraphrase. Where there is no discipline, there is no love. So because Jesus loves us and because he's passionate about all of his sheep in whatever season they're in, he gives. [00:57:48] Speaker B: His process for how to deal with. [00:57:50] Speaker A: Sin in the life of a fellow Christian. And then he gets really serious. Let's finish off our passage. Verse 18, Matthew 18:18. Yeah, there we go. [00:58:05] Speaker B: Truly, I tell you, whenever Jesus says. [00:58:10] Speaker A: That, it's a big deal. [00:58:16] Speaker B: Truly, I tell you. Guys, listen to what I'm about to say. This is serious. Disciples, Peter, James, John, gather the God. Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will have been bound. [00:58:31] Speaker A: Past tense, underline that we'll get to in a second. [00:58:34] Speaker B: Whatever you bind on earth will have been bound in heaven. And whatever you loose on earth will. [00:58:39] Speaker A: Have been loose in heaven. [00:58:41] Speaker B: Verse 19 Again. Truly, I tell you, he doubles down. Dude, Jesus doubles down on this. Truly, I tell you, if two of you on the earth agree about any matter that you pray for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. Verse 20. Probably the most out of context verse ever. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, I am there among them. [00:59:13] Speaker A: Dang it. The clock is my enemy. [00:59:16] Speaker B: This is Jesus. This is not Jesus. Writing a blank check. This is not Jesus. If two people agree on something and they pray for it, then yep, I'll do it. How do I know the Dodgers lost game one? Like it doesn't work. Like he's not writing a blank Check. This is not Jesus saying. He's not also saying you only need two or three people gathered together to have church? [00:59:46] Speaker A: Is Jesus with us? Absolutely. He's with you by yourself in your bedroom? [00:59:51] Speaker B: Of course he's with us. He's with his people. [00:59:54] Speaker A: He's Emmanuel. [00:59:55] Speaker B: Yes, of course. That's not what Jesus is saying here. Jesus is saying that when those two or three people from step one and step two are united in prayer, seeking God's will, God's desires, what heaven thinks, right, for their brother or their sister who's living in unrepentant sin, Jesus is with them, and heaven supports them in their attempt to discipline their brother or their sister. [01:00:24] Speaker A: You with me? My final point, It's a long one. You can write this down. [01:00:29] Speaker B: Is this when the ekklesia is prayerfully united with what God wants? Jesus is with them and heaven supports them in their pursuit of a sheep that's gone astray? [01:00:44] Speaker A: That's what he's saying. [01:00:46] Speaker B: He's not writing a blank check. He's not endorsing two or three people. You don't need the rest of the ecclesia. [01:00:52] Speaker A: That's not what he's saying. [01:00:53] Speaker B: He's talking about church discipline. He's talking about discipline in the family. He's talking about the sheep that are going astray that he dearly loves and our role that we get to play in partnership with God to see all of us not wander too far off, not leave the fold, not leave the flock. [01:01:13] Speaker A: And so here's my heart, guys. [01:01:15] Speaker B: My heart for you is the same. [01:01:17] Speaker A: Thing that God's been challenging with me this week. [01:01:18] Speaker B: It's like, I want us to see the role that God himself invites each one of us to play in his. [01:01:26] Speaker A: Pursuit of people that he loves. All right, I'm going to call the band up. I'm going to close here in just a second, but I need a drink of water first. Pardon me for a second. Sunday, no, Saturday, we get back from the camping trip. Wonderful time. What a blessing that was, guys. That was so fun. Get back from the camping trip. I'm prepping for this message, and I'm feeling all sorts of things because this. [01:02:16] Speaker B: Is a heavy text. I know it's a heavy text. I knew it was a heavy text. [01:02:19] Speaker A: Before I was gonna preach it. There's a lot going on here. We could do a series on this passage because there's so much here. And so I told my, hey, let him know I'm going to preach long this morning. Thank you for bearing with me some of You. Your bladders are overflowing. I appreciate you staying with me Saturday. I'm prepping for this. [01:02:36] Speaker B: I'm just praying. [01:02:36] Speaker A: I'm like, God, I need you to help me. [01:02:39] Speaker B: This is messy. It's hard, it's heavy, it's intense. [01:02:51] Speaker A: Guys, something happened to me. Something happened to me. I'm sitting at the table. The only way I can think to describe it is friendship with God. He just shared his heart with me. I don't know if this has ever happened to me in the extent that it did on Saturday. He just shared his heart with me about how he feels emotionally about his sheep, specifically when his sheep wander and go astray. [01:03:40] Speaker B: I'm not exaggerating. [01:03:43] Speaker A: I'm embarrassed to tell you. I cried for over an hour and I couldn't stop. And it just kept coming, and it just kept coming, and it just kept coming. And I was like, oh, my God, Jesus, please be gentle, because this is. [01:03:54] Speaker B: Like, more than I could bear. But I felt it and it happened out. It came from outside of me. It was almighty God sharing his heart of how he feels, how he's moved. [01:04:07] Speaker A: Emotionally when his beloved stray. And I could only handle it for about an hour. I had to get up and get out. [01:04:16] Speaker B: I had to, like, literally physically remove myself. It was like a travailing prayer. [01:04:26] Speaker A: And the part that just wrecked me was that he made it abundantly clear. It's not like an out there thing. Like, it's an us thing. There's some of you in the room like, you're in unrepentant sin right now, and you know it. And for some of you, like, nobody's confronted you. This is the part that gets me up. I'm gonna keep it back for now, okay? This is the part that just gets me. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that you haven't experienced the love of God through his people to go, hey, can I talk to you about that? Because I care about your soul more than I care about using you for fun or companionship. I'm so sorry. And then I just convince there's others of you. You have been confronted. You have been confronted by a spouse, by a friend, by a leader, by a pastor. And you're like, no, get defensive. Push them away. [01:05:46] Speaker B: Justify it. [01:05:49] Speaker A: And I feel like we're going to go long. I'm sorry, guys, we have to. Right before this passage, do you remember what Jesus says? [01:05:58] Speaker B: He's talking about leaving the 99 for the 1. And what he says in 18, verse 14, he says in the Same way he goes to your heavenly Father. He rejoices when he finds the one and the one comes back. He rejoices over that sheep more than over the 99 that did not go astray. And he says, if someone has 100 sheep and one of them goes astray, won't he leave the 99 on the hillside and go search for the stray? And if he finds it, oh, that haunts me. [01:06:32] Speaker A: This is how he ends it. He goes in the same way. It is not the will of your Father in heaven that one of these Christians should perish. One of these sheep in the flock should. [01:06:44] Speaker B: It's not the will of the Father. It grieves the Father's heart. And that's what he was sharing with me on Saturday, and I couldn't handle it. And I'm like, he feels I'm getting a drop in the ocean of what he feels for the sheep that he loves when they go astray. The sheep are us. It's us. It's you, it's me, it's us. And his heart, it grieves God's heart when his ecclesia is divided, when bitterness is fostered and harbored in our hearts, it grieves him. It grieves the Father's heart when his sheep go astray. [01:07:21] Speaker A: Why? [01:07:21] Speaker B: Because it's dangerous for their soul. And if they don't repent, he says, they're gonna perish. It grieves God's heart when people are lonely and they don't have biblical friends that actually love them. It grieves God's heart when we don't love each other enough to do step. And I felt it. And I just humbly, before you going, I'm not perfect. I don't do this perfectly. But holy smokes, Jesus is worth trying to do this right. He knows better than I do. [01:07:54] Speaker A: And he says, when you do this. [01:07:55] Speaker B: Church, he goes, jesus says, when you do this, he is there with us. [01:07:59] Speaker A: And heaven supports us. [01:08:02] Speaker B: His words. [01:08:06] Speaker A: And so, gosh, man, I'm so sorry. We're running out of time. But I want to give you a chance to respond this morning. And there's a handful of things that stand out to me. The first is this. [01:08:16] Speaker B: You're lonely. [01:08:17] Speaker A: And I just want to tell you, Jesus wants to be your friend. Jesus wants to be your friend. He wants to be your friend. That's what he was doing with me on Saturday morning. [01:08:27] Speaker B: He was just inviting me into friendship. [01:08:30] Speaker A: He was sharing his heart with me. Did you know there's no other friend like Jesus? [01:08:38] Speaker B: We Talk about top shelf friends. [01:08:44] Speaker A: He doesn't get any more top shelf than Jesus. There's no greater love in this than a man who has laid down his life for his friends. He calls you friend. How do you know? Because he opened his veins. He willingly went to the cross. He laid his life down because he wants to be your friend. [01:09:01] Speaker B: Isn't that what he does? This whole step, he confronts us with our sin. Not to condemn us, but to free us. To offer us the invitation to repent. Opportunity for forgiveness. We're gonna talk about forgiveness next week. [01:09:12] Speaker A: You're here. You're lonely. Jesus wants to be your friend. Maybe you're here. [01:09:15] Speaker B: There's bitterness in your heart. [01:09:16] Speaker A: Can I just beg you to repent? [01:09:18] Speaker B: Just get the poison out. [01:09:20] Speaker A: Please. [01:09:20] Speaker B: Repent. Get it out. And I've been bitter in my heart. [01:09:22] Speaker A: I'm not throwing stones at you. [01:09:24] Speaker B: If bitterness is the fruit, pride is. [01:09:26] Speaker A: The root of what's going on. Repent. Don't elevate yourself above anybody else. [01:09:31] Speaker B: Maybe you're here and you know it. I've been talking about it and you know it. You need to have a difficult conversation. [01:09:35] Speaker A: With a brother or sister and it's awkward. It shouldn't be. Not when love is present. Not when humility is present. Hey, can I talk to you about something? Because I love you and I'd want you to talk to me if you saw it in me. Maybe you're here and you need to move towards somebody in love the way that God has moved towards you. Or maybe you're here and you just need to receive forgiveness. Man. Like you need to receive the gospel. Jesus died to be your friend. I know that sounds cheesy and lame, but it's the greatest news ever. He lived the perfect life in our place and died the death that you and I deserve in our place. He was our substitute and he did that because he wanted to reconcile you to the family. He made a way. You can receive forgiveness. [01:10:29] Speaker B: You can receive that burden being lifted. [01:10:32] Speaker A: That shame being lifted off of your shoulders. Some of you need to confess things this morning. Get things out into the light. [01:10:38] Speaker B: I've seen. [01:10:39] Speaker A: Honestly, it's been beautiful. [01:10:40] Speaker B: We were talking about. [01:10:40] Speaker A: We've seen an increase in confession recently. It's been beautiful. God's on the move. He's doing something. And there's one more thing I have to share. I'm sorry. [01:10:52] Speaker B: I know we're late. [01:10:56] Speaker A: Youth. Can I just talk to you guys for a second? I'm gonna refer to something that's mature in nature. Okay? I'm Gonna do it diplomatically. Parents, I'm gonna try to do this. Well, when I was growing up, there was a phrase that people used called friends with benefits. And it was this. Now it's like hookup culture. And the concept is. The concept is using somebody else's body in selfish ways without taking responsibility. That's the concept. And I felt it with every fiber in my being. This morning, I felt like some of you need to repent because you've been doing that with Jesus, girl. Treating Jesus as a bride, like a friend with benefits. Wanting access to the body without yielding to the lordship of Jesus, without the commitment of practicing repentance. If that's you, I have really good news for you. Jesus died to forgive you, to cleanse you, to invite you back into the flock when you walk astray. Will you stand with me? If you're able. I want to pray for us. [01:12:26] Speaker B: We're at noon right now. [01:12:30] Speaker A: We do not typically do this, but what we're going to do is I'm going to invite the prayer team forward. Will you guys come forward, please? And what I'm going to do is I'm going to pray over you. I'm going to pray over us. And then when I'm done praying, I'm gonna open up the space for ministry. We're gonna praise. I'm gonna ask you to send one parent to grab your kid, if that's okay, or your kids. But I know that God wants to do things this morning. I don't want you to go. [01:13:07] Speaker B: If you need to support a spouse. [01:13:08] Speaker A: With the kids and take turns, let's do it. I don't want you to go without receiving prayer. If one of those things is you. I think God wants to meet with you. I think he wants to touch your. [01:13:17] Speaker B: Life in a way that brings serious. [01:13:19] Speaker A: Transformation for you this morning, in a personal way, because he's filled with grace and he's rich in mercy. You with me? I'm gonna pray over you. Let my words be few for the sake of time. I want to honor the people that are serving us in the back right now. Holy Spirit, have your way among us. That's our prayer. Have your way among us. Discipline us. Your word says you discipline those you love because you care. And so, Father, we pray that you'd make us a people who yield more and more to your spirit, regardless of. [01:13:51] Speaker B: Our age, regardless of our stage of life. [01:13:55] Speaker A: I pray that we would take you at your word and trust you and know that all of this, this whole passage, what an absolute example of grace. And patience and love and mercy than. [01:14:13] Speaker B: The pursuit of a father in heaven to wayward sheep. [01:14:17] Speaker A: Let us never forget, let us never grow arrogant and prideful. You are the savior, Jesus, save us. Over and over and over and over and over again we pray. We love you and we yield to you, great shepherd. In your name, Jesus. Amen. Those who can, we would typically spend. [01:14:38] Speaker B: About 15 or 20 minutes responding. [01:14:40] Speaker A: I want to give you an opportunity to do that. We'd fill this room with praise. [01:14:43] Speaker B: People would receive prayer. [01:14:45] Speaker A: This morning's a little different and I think that's okay. If you can go grab your kiddos. [01:14:49] Speaker B: And try to try to maintain space for people that are receiving ministry. [01:14:53] Speaker A: If the kids get loud and stuff, maybe we can move them outside. [01:14:55] Speaker B: If you just want to talk and connect, that's beautiful. [01:14:57] Speaker A: Take that outside. But let's leave this space. Let's preserve this space. Space. Okay. I love you guys very much. Enjoy.